2023-12-01 それは、諸葛亮が司馬懿を挑発するために、「司馬懿に女物の衣服を贈る」という話です。 [長年日記]

突然ですが、三国志の中では、私は「司馬懿 v.s 諸葛亮」が好きですが、その中でも特に「五丈原の戦い」が好きです。

Suddenly, in the Romance of the Three Kingdoms, I like "Shiba I v.s Zhuge Liang," especially "Battle of Gojougen. "


("Battle of Gojougen" and "Battle of Iryo," followed by "Battle of Sekiheki," and so on).

Of course, I am not referring to Eiji Yoshikawa's "Three Kingdoms" but to the "Three Kingdoms" drama series.


It is the story of Zhuge Liang's gift of women's clothing to Shiba I to provoke Shiba Ii.


However, I don't quite understand the words and actions of the outraged subordinate.

もちろん、部下の怒りが分からない訳ではないのですが、戦略的に明々白々の挑発に乗るほどのことか? とも思います。

Of course, I am not unaware of my subordinates' anger, but I wonder if it is strategically important enough to take advantage of a clear-cut provocation.


However, from the common sense of the time, this would have been a considerable provocation and insult.



I wondered if there was some way to understand the feelings of my furious subordinate from a modern perspective.

―― 司令部にいる将軍(男性)が、女性用の派手なビキニの水着を贈られて、「着て見せろ」と言われた

"A general (male) at the command headquarters is presented a fancy bikini swimsuit for women and asked to try it."


I guess it is like that.


If I were a general, I would be so furious that I might launch strategic nuclear missiles into the enemy camp.


Regardless, historical anecdotes require some ingenuity to understand the characters' emotions.



By the way, Shiba, I wore the women's clothes and asked 'look good?' to Zhuge Liang's messenger in reverse.


Considering the above "swimsuit," I think you can realize the "greatness of the degree of Shiba i. "

2023-12-02 ―― 「踊るプレゼンテータ」とは、私のことだったのか [長年日記]


Weekly debriefings on the research progress are held in front of the members of the university's laboratory.


The turn will come around every two months, and we will give presentations in Japanese and English.


Since the time allotted for a presentation is approximately 5 to 7 minutes, the materials used to prepare the presentation are usually about ten pages.


But in my case, I have to prepare a little bit of a not-so-funny amount of pages.


This time, it was 49 pages; last time, it was 51.



It is not a matter of "more is better.


It is an important skill to summarize your progress and results in a complete and short document.


A large amount of material is burdensome for the reader, but even for me, it is impossible to explain this in less than 7 minutes.


And, well, the result is a presentation that feels like 'skip 2/3 of the way through and just present the abstract and conclusion.



And, well, why is this happening? First, because I have been brainwashed into a pattern of patent specification writing.

背景 → 課題 → 課題を解決する既存の手段 → それでも解決できない課題 → その課題を解決する手段 → 解決方法

Background → Problem → Existing means to solve the problem → Problem that still cannot be solved → Means to solve the problem → Solution


This is because I am stuck in thinking about this approach.


The second is to cut corners.


This is because if you put the materials together on such an occasion, you can copy and paste or otherwise reuse them when you make another presentation or paper.



After the presentation in English, a question and answer session will naturally follow in English.


Half of the attendees (about 20?) are foreigners, so we must deal with this.


Of course, my English is "that" English, so naturally, I cannot hope to give a logical explanation.


Body gestures, hand gestures, and various metaphors are used to explain.


Frankly, it is "disgraceful".


And I noticed that one of the audience members was laughing, imitating my gestures.


After the presentation, I was reminded of this column.

―― 「踊るプレゼンテータ」とは、私のことだったのか

"I guess the "dancing presenter" was me."


I was pretty disappointed.

2023-12-03 先日、YouTubeのショートを見ていたら、私の作成した図が使われていました。 [長年日記]


The other day, I watched a short on YouTube, and a figure I created was used.


I have spent a lot of time thinking about and creating this figure.


If he is going to quote (Article 32 of the Copyright Act), shouldn't he 'include the reference (URL, etc.) in the video?' I think so.


ちなみに、YouTubeで、"死後 脅迫 フローチャート"で、検索すると、その動画が見つかります。

By the way, if you go to YouTube and search for "postmortem threats flowchart," you will find the video clip.

2023-12-04 そういえば、私も、学生時代に、プラモデルの会社に乗り込んで、ラジコンカーを一台貰ってきたりしていました。 [長年日記]


I am working with young people in my research activities, and I always think,

―― 若いって、勢いがあるなぁ

"Young people are so energetic."



I am moved to see them running into government agencies and vendors to get data.


Whenever working people ask someone to do something, they always prepare a "return."


That (return) is the most important thing.


This is because working people do not spend money and time on things that do not benefit them.



I would not say that students "don't" have that perspective, but I think it is "thin."


Frankly, I envy them.

Come to think of it, when I was a student, I used to go to a plastic model company and get one of their radio-controlled cars.



It is also a fact that working people are

―― 若い人の『私心のない一生懸命』に弱い

"moved for their unselfish hard work."


2023-12-05 ―― ハッカー(クラッカー)側の一人勝ちとなる世界が到来する [長年日記]


I am genuinely sick and tired of receiving instructions from the company about security measures.


(1) First of all, I don't understand what the material is about. I have no idea what they want to do for what purpose.


(2) According to the manual, I have never been able to set it up successfully in one shot.


(3) After setting up, attempts to restart the computer fail pretty, and in the worst case, the entire system can be destroyed. It is not even possible to restore the system to its original state.


By the way, this is my story as an 'IT engineer.'


Such instructions would be a 'nightmare' for those who do not.


このような複雑な設定作業を、エンドユーザに押し付ける ―― これは、『エンジニア集団の会社』だからでしょうか?

Is it because this is a "company of engineers" that forces the end user to go through such a complicated setup process?

それなら諦めるしかないと思いますが ―― それでも、私は本当に怖いです。

Then I guess I'll have to give up, but I'm still really scared.


Or rather, if a security operation fails, work stops for the day, and if it is not good, you may not be able to do anything for a few days or a week.


It is worse than a cyber attack.


Several times, I have encountered that kind of thing.



In the future, cyber attacks will become even more sophisticated and advanced. And maybe we will not be able to keep up.


An attacker can focus only on the attack, but we cannot allow our day to be spent only on defense.


It is a very demanding work environment, doing defense and regular work.



If this continues and security measures become even more difficult for us to keep up with in the future,

―― ハッカー(クラッカー)側の一人勝ちとなる世界が到来する

-- A world in which hackers (crackers) will be the sole winners.


I feel so.



So, the countermeasure is,


- Abandon all computers, smartphones, and the Internet.


Even if it is impossible to say,


- Tracing back time to the days of dial-up connections


I am seriously thinking that we should regress to this point.

2023-12-06 ふーん、20万円どころか、1000万円を越えても、納税しないでいいんだぁ~ [長年日記]

Q1: 自民党の政治団体のキックバックが話題になっています。このキックバックはどのような問題が発生するのか教えて下さい

Q1: There has been a lot of talk about kickbacks from LDP political groups. Please tell me what kind of problems these kickbacks can cause.

Q2: このキックバックの行為は、どの法律に抵触することになりますか

Q2: Which law would this kickback activity violate?

Q3: 我が国の法律に限定して、可能であれば条文も指定して下さい。

Q3: Please specify only the laws of our country and, if possible, also the text of the articles.

Q4: 政治資金規正法に限定して、抵触する条文を推定して下さい。

Q4: Please estimate the conflicting articles, limited to the Political Funds Control Law.

Q5: キックバックで得られた資金は、本来課税対象になるものでしょうか

Q5: Are kickback funds taxable in nature?

Q6: つまり、キックバックで得られた資金について報告がない、ということは脱税が行われたという理解で良いでしょうか

Q6: In other words, is it correct to say that there is no report on the funds obtained through kickbacks, meaning that tax evasion has occurred?



What I wanted to know, at the bottom, is the answer to this last question (Q6).


ChatGPT: "Yes, if you do not report the funds obtained from kickbacks and do not declare them taxable to the tax authorities, it may be considered an act of tax evasion."


ChatGPT: "Tax evasion is a serious legal offense and a violation of tax law."


ChatGPT: "Failure to properly report taxes and avoid paying them is a criminal offense in many countries."



To derive an answer from ChatGPT, we must repeat these questions and answers to elicit the answer.


It is a bit tedious but much more helpful than bulletin boards and social networking sites.


That aside.



Recently, I have been limiting my writing activities, so I don't file tax returns, but even so, if the amount exceeds 200,000 yen, I file a self-report and pay the additional tax.


Hmmm...they don't have to pay taxes even if it's over 10 million yen, let alone 200,000 yen...


They can do that kind of thing.


And such persons are members of our country's parliament.


Being a Member of Parliament is wonderful.


(If I have misunderstood the interpretation of the kickback, anyone is welcome to point it out. I will publish your remarks through the Ebata Firewall.)

2023-12-07 『自分の子どもを守る為であれば、あらゆる手段をとって、全てを敵に回して、見苦しく無様に闘え。お前、その子の"親"なんだろう?』 [長年日記]

学校の強い部活動の運営管理者に対して、校長のガバナンスが全く効かない ―― というのを、私は良く知っています。

I know the principal's governance is ineffective against the school's strong club operations manager.


Especially about club activities that can compete at the national tournament level, teachers and supervisors in the field can do whatever they want.


I, myself, have fought the school before to protect my daughter.


I still have the documents that I had the principal and the teacher sign in a deposition confirming that fact in my home safe.


If the same problem occurs again at that school, I plan to blurt out the entire dossier.


江端:「校長先生。あの学校に派手に飾られている『祝 全国大会出場』などと書かれている垂れ幕は、私の娘や他の子どもたちの心身を破壊し尽して得たもの ―― そういう理解でいいんですよね」

Ebata: "Principal. The banners that are flamboyantly displayed in that school that say 'Congratulations on your participation in the national tournament' were obtained by destroying the bodies and minds of my daughter and other children--is that my understanding?


Principal: "That's not why..."


Ebata: "What value is there in a national tournament that you have to destroy the children to enter?"


Principal: "..."



Therefore, I can understand the situation of 'the Chancellor's governance is not working at all' about the issue of marijuana use by the Nihon University football team.


Therefore, at the time of discovery of "acts in conflict with the law," it should be determined that "this trouble exceeded the scope of the school governance," and the rest should be left to law enforcement (police) and the judiciary (courts and tribunals).


I have said before that if the field (teachers) can't solve the problem of bullying, then give it up and let the police and courts handle it (but I'm looking for this diary now and can't find it).



I want to take this opportunity to say a few words.


"To protect your child, you must fight in every way possible, against everything and everyone, in an ugly and disgraceful manner. You are the child's parent, aren't you?"

2023-12-08 今の大学キャンパスで「パレスチナ問題」を知っている学生がいたら、私はビックリするでしょう。 [長年日記]


As I have written , I dislike the line "even if it is against the world".

However, there are real governments and people who make it their "national policy".



By the way, there was a time when the youth of our country (not all youth, of course) were in solidarity in support of Palestine (anti-Israel, of course).


Support for Palestine in the Japanese student movement of the 1970s continued into later years and played a role in supporting Palestine's quest for independence and rights.

抗議運動、デモンストレーション、パレスチナ解放機構(PLO)への支援、加えて、ベトナム反戦運動、など、はっきりいって、当時の大学キャンパスは、無法地帯 ―― もとい「開放区」だったのです。

Protests, demonstrations, support for the Palestine Liberation Organization (PLO), and the anti-Vietnam war movement, to name a few, the university campus at the time was a lawless zone, or rather, an 'open zone'."the university campus at that time was a lawless zone, or rather an 'open zone.'


Unfortunately, I was born about 15 years too late and missed the chance to stand in this "open zone,", but I have kept up with the residue, I believe.

For example, in this way.



I am a college student now, and it seems that my university was a famous mother of quite radical activities in the 1960s and 1970s.


However, as far as I can see, not a single student is shouting "Palestine solidarity" on college campuses.


Well, naturally.


I would be surprised if any student on a college campus today knew about the "Palestinian issue".

2023-12-09 私にとって、「謙虚」は、美徳ではなく、生存戦略です。「誠実」が戦略であるように。 [長年日記]


When I was younger, arguing and winning were some things that felt good, but now, I am not interested in that kind of thing.

To begin with, I start from the premise that my knowledge and understanding are 'insufficient.'


So I study, I listen to others, and if it makes sense to me, I take it in.


"Argumentation" seems to me to be a vulgar word.



For an engineer like me, " argumentation" is not so necessary.


My thought form is roughly like this.


(1) Think and make something,


(2) If it works, it is "right"; if not, it is "wrong",


(3) If it is wrong, fix it so that it works correctly,


(4) If I don't know whether it is right today, I may find out tomorrow or later.



Of course, the idea ((1) above) does not start completely neutral.


I do not deny that I begin from emotions (mainly "anger").


Without it, I cannot even begin to think.



As I have told you before, engineers and researchers must "keep losing."


As long as I "keep losing," I must avoid "big losses" that prevent me from playing the next game.


It is essential to keep losing "small" and, on the rare occasions when I win, try to "win small" in a less conspicuous way.


I believe that if there is such a thing as a winning condition for engineers and researchers, it is to "make it look small," no matter what the winners and losers are.


This is often 'mistaken' for 'humility.'



For me, "humility" is not a virtue but a survival strategy.


Just as "integrity" is a strategy.


Recently, however, I have often wondered if this survival strategy of "humility" might have hindered Japan's technological progress in recent years.


I'll get back to you on that.

2023-12-10 マジで、私たちは、『投票率が1ケタになる選挙』を、目撃することができるかもしれません。 [長年日記]


As a researcher studying methods for measuring social capital, I am interested in the question,

―― 今(*)、解散総選挙をやったら、一体何がどうなるか?

"What exactly would happen if we held a general election now?"


(*) A case of slush funds at 100 Diet members by a ruling party faction, commonly known as the "LDP Party Ticket Kickback Scandal. The case is said to be on the level of the recruiting case.





(1) want to do this kind of simulation,


(2) want to know what kind of solution my simulator will give, and


(3) want to verify the answers




If we hold a general election now, we, the people, will be in trouble.

It will be this kind of election.


- To put it another way, it was an election, like which is better, "robbery," "fraud," or "pickpocketing."


- The election was not about "where is better," but "where would cause less damage."


We could witness an 'election where turnout is in the single digits.'

2023-12-11 かつて、日本人は、イスラエルの人々に対して、ハマスと同じことをやったことがあります。 [長年日記]


The Japanese once did the same thing to the Israeli people as Hamas.

Tel Aviv Airport Shooting.


It was an indiscriminate terrorist attack by the JRA(*) that killed 26 unarmed civilians and seriously injured 80 others at the airport.


(*) The Japanese Red Army and the United Red Army are different organizations but will be called the JRA.


At that time, the majority of the Japanese people hated the JRA's terrorism, and the Japanese people and the Japanese government made one of the biggest apologies to the State of Israel.


They are Japanese in that they don't just say, "They are strangers and just idiots."


The Japanese government (police) then embarked on a campaign to destroy the JRA (and the United Red Army).


And since the 2000s, no organizational activity has been confirmed.



The difference between Hamas and the JRA is in the level of popular support.


Hamas has a certain amount of support from people in the Gaza Strip (and rightly so).


In comparison, the JRA and Rengo-Sekigun had almost no popular support, but they still had the support of some radical students.


However, after the revelations of the JRA's "mass lynching" of the Asama-Sanso incident, even that faint support was lost.


Aside from that.



The country of Israel has always retaliated against attacks on Israel.


As far as I know, the retaliation rate is 100%.


However, about the Tel Aviv airport shooting incident, there has been no confirmation of Israeli retaliation against Japan.


However, I think there was a good chance of that happening.


Of course, the likelihood of Israel taking direct military action against Japan, a U.S. military ally, is infinitesimally small.


Nevertheless, they could have infiltrated the Illegals (illegal combatants) to carry out retaliatory activities.


If that had happened, there would have been a possibility that a small number of Japanese civilians would have been killed.


I think that they were lucky that the Japanese people had given up the JRA.


これは仮定の話ですが ――

This is a hypothetical story,

日本赤軍の拠点を壊滅することを目的として、イスラエル空軍が日本国土を空爆して、関係のない民間人を巻き添えに殺害するようなことになれば ―― 日本国民は、それを許さない、と思います。

If the Israeli Air Force bombed Japanese soil to destroy the JRA's strongholds, killing uninvolved civilians as collateral damage -- the Japanese people would not allow that to happen.


At least, I would never forgive them.



That is what is taking place in the Gaza Strip right now.

2023-12-12 『犬を、飼いたいけど、散歩や餌やりは面倒なので、(私に)やって欲しい。という訳で、管理はよろしく』 [長年日記]


It may come as a surprise to you, but I like animals, especially dogs and cats.


When I was a child, our family at that time took care of the "end" of our dog and cat, who were like family members.


I knew the phenomenon of "crying so hard you spit up blood" from Miyuki Nakajima's song, but I was honestly surprised to learn that "it was in me.


When my parents died, I did not grieve as much.


My father said the same thing when my grandmother died.


I thought, 'We are Parents and children.'


なにしろ、私の両親の葬式では、通夜の時に、親戚と一緒になって、故人の思い出話で爆笑していたくらいです ―― 父も母も、ネタ満載の人生でした。

After all, at my parents' funeral, I even joined my relatives at the wake and laughed at their memories of the deceased -- both my father and mother had a life full of stories.


Me: "Well, a wake is a lot of fun because there are hidden stories (quite amazing stories) about the deceased that the children don't know."


Wife: "No, I don't. I think 'your parent's life is just too peculiar.'"


Me: "Really?"


Aside from that.



I still vividly remember the death of my pet, and after that, I couldn't bring myself to get a dog or cat.


Still, I was willing to 'give in' and allow my daughters to own it if desired.

夕焼けの中、犬を抱き抱えた娘といっしょに歩きながら、定番のセリフ 『お前が、ちゃんと一人で面倒を見るんだぞ』と言う、というのを予想していたのですが ――

I was expecting to walk with my daughter with the dog in her arms at sunset and say the classic line, "You're going to have to take care of him all by yourself" --


Daughter: "I want to keep a dog, but it is too much trouble to walk and feed it, so I want (me) to do it. So, please take care of it."


Thus, my daughter said such dumb things, and naturally, I kicked her proposal.

2023-12-13 『クリスマスに一緒に過す恋人がいない』という嘆き(あるいは、呪い)の言葉は、多分、今後100年以上も引き継がれていくのだろう、と、しみじみと実感しております。 [長年日記]


I was honestly surprised to see my second daughter grumbling,


'I don't have a boyfriend to spend Christmas with.'



I had selfishly assumed that such a paradigm had long since "ended."



About 20 years ago, I released several columns about Christmas.

The following column discusses the significance of spending time with the opposite sex at Christmas.

The following column is a review comment from a firm's senior member regarding the above column.

In addition, two years after this, I also released a diary criticizing the "instrumentalization of Christmas."


In any case, it was undeniable that I was highly interested in Christmas.



Now, 30 years later, I cannot hide my amazement that the paradigm has not changed.


I am deeply aware that the lament (or curse) that "there is no one of the boyfriends or girlfriends to spend Christmas with" will probably be passed on for the next 100 years or more.

2023-12-14 アニメ「葬送のフリーレン」のオープニング(日本語と英語版の両方)を聞かせれば、英語や国語が『人を感動させる道具(あるいは武器)になる得る』という実例を、分かって貰えるんじゃないかなぁ、とか考えています。 [長年日記]


"Why Should I study? "


This is a universal question against adults regarding children's studies, and difficult.

I have written about it here,

■古典は必要か → 使う場面ないじゃんか?

- Do I need the classics? There's no use for them, is there?

■歴史は必要か → 昔の話を持ちだしてどうする?

- Do I need the history? What's the point of bringing up old stories?

■英語は必要か → (江端試算では)4%の日本人しか使っていないぞ?

- Do I need English? → (According to Ebata's estimate) Only 4% of Japanese people use English.

■現国は必要か → 文庫本が読める程度の漢字を知っていればいいんじゃないの?

- Do I need Japanese →? Don't I need to know enough kanji to read a paperback book?

■体育は必要か → 日常生活で、走ったり跳んだり泳いだりする必要性はあるか?

- Do I need physical → Is there a need to run, jump, or swim daily?

■理科は必要か → リトマス試験紙が何色になるかが、そんなに重要か?*)

■ Do I need science → Is it so important what color the litmus test paper turns out to be


In response to these questions, 'Shut up and study! To the point where adults yell at children --- this is a typical package.


This is shameful as an adult.


Adults must not neglect their efforts to answer children's questions.



I think that if you play the opening of the anime "Souei no Freelen" (both the Japanese and English versions), children will understand that English and the Japanese language can be tools (or weapons) to move people.

English version

Japanese version



This is the first time I have ever felt "literature" in an anime opening.


Of course, music is an art form, but I believe this is a new field of literature.


I pay the utmost respect to the creators of this music.


Well, the following is what I recalled about the opening of this animation.


Well, it's a "helpless" story.

2023-12-15 異世界や魔法が登場する物語で、私は「ずるい」と思うのは、後付けて、新しい能力や魔力を使えるころです。 [長年日記]


In stories with other worlds and magic, I find "cheating" when they can retrofit and use new abilities and magic.


If the story aims to "bring peace to the world," it is sufficient to exercise the "ability/magic to bring peace to the world" from the beginning.


Its animation ends after the first minute.



In comparison, our natural world is constrained by the "laws of physics.


We are born with individual differences, differences in ability, differences between rich and poor, and unreasonableness, irrationality, and there is no means to resolve them at the root.


Most of the time, the effort only ends up in what we made the effort.


In the middle of the effort, life ends without notice. No exceptions.


And as for the "other world," it has never left the level of creation, and its existence has never been proven in history.



This is why stories with other worlds and magic are "cheating."


Still, I think this world is full of ancient and modern creations because "if you don't read such stories, you can't make it in this world.

2023-12-16 ―― 殺したくなっても、その実行は1週間後にする [長年日記]


I write columns and diaries about whatever I want, and I don't think there have been many cases where the content of my columns and diaries has come under fire.




Because we try not to respond immediately.



Expressing one's opinion immediately after an incident is a bad idea.


First, if you base your opinion on an incorrect news source, you are expressing an opinion you do not intend.


However, that unintended opinion becomes "fixed" in the world as your opinion.


Next, within a few days to a week, the facts will become clear, and the direction of public opinion will be set.

炎上をしないようにするためには、世論の方向に乗る ―― つまり、日和(ひよ)ればいいのです。

To avoid a firestorm, you must ride the direction of public opinion -- in other words, you must be opportunistic.



In contrast, if I go head-to-head with public opinion, I will only announce considerable time and exhaustive research and calculation.


This is less inflammatory because it will require the same degree of research and calculation from those who refute me.


Many people don't want to spend the time to do the research and calculations.



So, let me summarize,


(1) I do not respond immediately but assess the facts and public reaction.


(2) I will let most opinions side with my opinion.


(3) If I decide against (2) above, take sufficient time to exhaust my research and calculations.


So, I guess that is what I will call my fire prevention.


今、「NHKスペシャル 選 映像記録 関東大震災 帝都壊滅の三日間」を見ていたのですが、

I was just watching "NHK Special: Selected Video Recordings - The Great Kanto Earthquake: Three Days of Imperial City Devastation,"


It is said that during the Great Kanto Earthquake, 321 people were slaughtered, according to official records, and tens of thousands of people unofficially due to the rumor that "Koreans are setting fires" and "Koreans are poisoning wells" (of course, I am well aware of this story as well).


This is "the massacre of Koreans by Japanese officially recognized by the Japanese nation" by our Japanese (ancestors).


I am confident that I (Ebata) would also lose my sanity in a panic if a catastrophe of this magnitude occurred.


My threshold for anger is so low that I think I would quickly lose my sanity and easily become complicit in the slaughter.


I don't think that "I (Ebata) am the only one who can act rationally."



So, I am always thinking,

―― 殺したくなっても、その実行は1週間後にする

"Even if I want to kill someone, wait a week before I do it."


This is the only thing I can say to myself.


If, even a week later, I decide that this fact will not change, I can join the slaughter at that point.

2023-12-17 「まだChatGPTを使ってない人は『人生を悔い改めた方がいい』」 ―― と言った、ソフトバンクの孫社長に申し上げます。『いらんこと言うな』と。 [長年日記]


I fear the "subscribe" system, which invites me to join for "free" for a month and then automatically transitions to a system where membership fees are collected without warning.


Not just subs, but all IT services these days are like this.

As stated in "The Day Ebata Lost to AI," AI-based services have recently exploited me.

当初、私は、ChatGPT(対話型AIアシスタント))、Grammerly(英語文章構成サービス), Deepl(翻訳サービス)を、無料で使ってきたのですが、私のそのサービスの利用頻度は、無料の範囲を越えてしまい、全て有料の会員となっています。

Initially, I used ChatGPT (interactive AI assistant)), Grammerly (English sentence structure service), and Deepl (translation service) for free. Still, my frequency of using those services has gone beyond the free range, and I have become a paid member.


I cannot imagine my "writing activities" and "research activities" without these supports.


「まだChatGPTを使ってない人は『人生を悔い改めた方がいい』」 ―― と言った、ソフトバンクの孫社長に申し上げます。

I want to say to Mr. Son, President of Softbank, who said, "If you are not using ChatGPT yet, you should repent your life.


"Don't say unnecessary things."



President Son is right.You are not wrong at all.

しかし ―― それでも、ChatGPTや生成AIの利便性は、それを理解できる者だけの既得権益としておくべきです。

But -- still, the convenience of ChatGPT and generative AI should remain a vested interest only for those who can understand it.


I want those not using ChatGPT to stay on it and not use it.

なに、あと20年くらいでいいんです ―― 私の人生が終えるくらいまでで十分ですから。その後は、どうでもいいですから。

I only need another 20 years or so -- that's enough time for me to finish my life. After that, I don't care.


I hope you don't use any other AI-based services.


It is easy to find out that AI-based services support my creations.


I don't want the world to know I am 'poor in my abilities' yet.



My monthly billing for AI-based services continues to grow, month after month, year after year.


I "depend" on these services.


Even if I were told that these services have tripled in price starting next month, I would still have to pay that amount.



When I read the article now

"How a host-crazed current college student can contribute "over 1 million yen every month",


I do not feel at all uncomfortable.


I rather 'sympathize' with her.


Now I stand on the side of women who depend on their hosts, saying, 'That's the way things are,' or 'It can't be helped.

2023-12-18 このキックバックは、政治資金規制法の理念である「政治活動の資金の流れは、全て可視化する」という理念を、ぶち壊すものです。 [長年日記]


Under the Political Funds Control Law, the total amount that an individual can donate to a political party is limited to 20 million yen per year. In comparison, donations made by an individual to the same political organization are limited to 1.5 million yen per year.


The problem is that 'donors who donate 50,000 yen or less in a year and payers of political fund parties of 200,000 yen or less do not have to be listed in the income and expenditure report.


In short, party tickets are truly a "delicious" system for both (1) politicians who want to avoid having their contributions listed and (2) their vested interests.


Or rather, the reality is that the law was "deliciously" designed.


If written in the style of a patent specification, it would be called "a device for producing a backing, or a method for producing a backing.



However, it is also a bit harsh to assume this.


The people of our country do not want to declare their support for a political party to others, nor do they want to be exposed to the "distance" of a politician.


The 'less than \50,000 and less than \200,000' is nothing less than a buffer to that.

それに、政治家と繋がることが「悪徳」のように見えるのは、我が国の国民性 ―― というか、ロッキード事件、佐川急便事件、リクルート事件をリアルタイムに見てきた私としては、「政治家 = 悪い人」と見えるのは仕方がないとも思えます。

And it is a national trait of our country that connecting with politicians is seen as a "vice" - or rather, having witnessed the Lockheed, Sagawa Express, and Recruiting scandals in real-time, I think it is inevitable that politicians are seen as "bad people."


This is a bad loop.



Breaking this loop is relatively simple: make it mandatory to list and report all donations of one yen or more.


We even clarified that 'there was a donation of 300 yen from an elementary school student's annual allowance,' and personal information is protected by the Personal Information Protection Law (where it can be anonymous).


In other words, the origin of the money remains unknown, but all information on the deposit side is disclosed down to the penny.



However, the kickback problem is like a "table-flipping" to all these above considerations.


This kickback scheme destroys the Political Funding Regulation Law principle, which states that "the flow of funds for political activities should all be visible.


I understand the politicians' thirst for 'unmonitored money for free political activity.


It's not hard to understand, with the lowly examples of "bellybutton money that the husband doesn't know about" and "side income that the wife doesn't know about."


However, political activities should be related to the people's interests and not be discussed in the same paradigm as the above treatment of private interests.



Members of parliament are sometimes referred to as "rule makers" and the ruling party as the "ruling party."


The people (I, as one of them) can't be helped if the rule-makers are breaking the rules.


So, why don't I "make it mandatory to list and report all donations of one yen or more"?


I feel that now is the time for the Digital Agency to move forward under the "Digitalization of Political Contributions."

2023-12-19 「パソコンを使っただけで不当に尊敬された時代」に、強制的にタイムリープさせられたような感じになりました。 [長年日記]


A few years into this century, there was a time when people said, 'IT is over.


I was doing network research then and thought, 'There is nothing more to do in IT.


The reason is that the network, which was little more than a garden watering hose, has been replaced by a network that looks like a giant tunnel. And not only at work but also at home.


Until then, I had been struggling to "mediate water disputes" (QoS control of the network); however, I felt foolish.


I will never forget the feeling of emptiness I had at that time.


I had a vague idea that bio- and clean energy would become the mainstream in the future.


Well, I was one of the few wizards who could handle the control system spell language (C/C++), so I thought I could make a living for the time being by doing maintenance work on the remaining equipment from the previous generation.


で、今、IT全然終っていません ―― というか、再起動しています。

And now, it's not finished at all -- or rather, it's being rebooted.


Thinking about where the conversion point was, I guess it would be the "cloud."


Then came the DX, and other things like "Raspy" appeared on the edge side.

The deciding factor was the "Generative AI" -- the impact was immense.



At a recent meeting, I was asked what I did for a living, to which I replied, "I'm an IT engineer," he replied, "Wow, that's great."


At that moment, I felt a little dizzy.


It was like being forced back in time to "a time when people were unjustly respected just for using computers."

2023-12-20 ご要望の通りに、なんぼでも作ってみせます ―― 品質(安全、安心、利便性)を無視していいのであれば、そんなもんは軽いもんです。 [長年日記]


I don't mean to say things like "engineers don't slack off," but I think "many engineers are serious people."


I may be able to bluff people, make them dance with pretty words, or smoke them out with a good-looking presentation or poster, but I am not very good at it.


Because engineers have to live in a world where "moving things around is a must.


Engineers who say, "I can't do it on time," should be able to rationalize why.


And if you are an engineer, you should understand why they do it.



I thought, "Well, the executives must be economics or law school graduates who only calculate money and time (120% more prejudice)," and did some research.


The president of Daihatsu was a man with a strong engineering background.


"If you change your position, you see a different landscape."


It may be that way, or it may be misguided.


Today, I will not assert anything or criticize anyone.



By the way, I am quick, whether it is a program, a patent specification, an article, or a column.


Mass production is my forte.

ご要望の通りに、なんぼでも作ってみせます ―― 品質(安全、安心、利便性)を無視していいのであれば、そんなもんは軽いもんです。

I will make whatever you request -- if quality (safety, security, convenience) can be ignored, such things are light.

2023-12-21 これまで、何度、雪の運転で、死にかけたか分かりません。 [長年日記]


Since yesterday, there have been news reports that "the whole country of Japan is panicking because of snow damage," so I panicked and changed my tires at noon today.


Fortunately, the weather was good in my area.



Not only for money but also for the peace of mind of knowing I can change a tire whenever I think of it.



I do not drive my automobile when it is snowing or still snowing.


I have a lot of trauma going in the snow.

- スキー場から帰宅の途中の衝突事故

- Collision on the way home from ski resort

- 高速道路のど真ん中でスリップ反転停止し、目の前に迫ってくるトラックに直撃されそうになったた事件

- An incident in which a truck almost hit a car coming right in front of the driver after he had a slip-flip stop in the middle of the highway.

- 長女をひとり残した車が、滑走して、自宅前で衝突して止った事件

- An incident in which a car that left the eldest daughter alone skidded, crashed, and stopped in front of a home.


I can't tell you how often I have almost died driving in the snow.



I will not take the car out if it is snowing, even if my wife or daughter asks me to.


I tell my family, 'Walk while russelling,' 'Call when you leave the station,' and 'Activate your GPS service.


If a rescue call comes in, I will carry my winter gear, food, and drinking water in my backpack and go to my family's rescue.


These things are sometimes no joke in a place called the Minamitama area of Tokyo.

2023-12-22 『あいつ、調子に乗ってんじゃん』という発言から、スタートするそうです。 [長年日記]


I am currently reading this book at the recommendation of my college professor.


In this book, a "switcher" appears.


Bullying is said to be a process of "verbalizing" one's dissatisfaction with a target, which builds up and cumulatively transforms into anger and hatred, which are then "justified" and "materialized."


It starts from the opinion that "He/She is getting carried away."

ところが、ここに一人、「空気が読めない奴 = スイッチャー」が「空気の読めない発言をする」ことで、その機能を停止させることができる、らしいのです。

However, one of the "airheads=switchers" here can stop that function by "making an airhead remark."



In college, I had difficulty getting into good conversations with my friends.


There were many times when I lost all confidence in myself because I was in situations where 'my comments made the place stop (or go blank).

However, I feel a little better today, knowing that there may have been occasions when my "lack of reading the air." was compelling.


But, if I think about it, I have mass-produced many "columns that don't read the air.


Still, I know I am not a "switcher" or something cool like they call me.

2023-12-23 そして、源氏物語は、現時点の社会通念に当てはめれば、インモラルのオンパレードです。「寝とり/寝とられ」「ロリコン」「ジェントロフィア」「浮気」「不同意性交(強姦)」―― 権力者による性加害(性暴力)の物語です。 [長年日記]


I was surprised to hear that next year's Taiga Drama will be "To Hikaru Kimi."


I wondered if NHK would finally abandon the "historical drama" route.


The Tale of Genji is a creation, not a historical tale.


The Tale of Genji is a parade of immorality if applied to current social conventions.

「寝とり/寝とられ」「ロリコン」「ジェントロフィア」「浮気」「不同意性交(強姦)」―― 権力者による性加害(性暴力)の物語です。

The story is about "cuckold/ cuckolded," "pedophile," "gerontophilia," "cheating," and "forced sexual intercourse (rape)" -- stories of sexual assault (sexual violence) by those in power.


However, the original author (Murasaki Shikibu) must be furious if Hikaru Genji is misinterpreted as a sex offender like "former Johnny Kitagawa of Johnny's Johnny" (by the way, all of Hikaru Genji's victims were women).


The above is an exaggerated (with extreme malice) account of one aspect of the Tale of Genji, so if you are interested, please read on. It is an exciting story in its own way.

I recommend the movie or novel "The Devil Wears Twelve Clothes" (but if you don't know the original story, it may not be interesting).

―― 多分、この話(源氏物語のドラマ化)は、私の勘違いだろう

"Maybe I'm wrong about this story (the dramatization of The Tale of Genji)."


I looked it up and found that the main character was "Fujiwara no Michinaga."


I have heard that "Fujiwara no Michinaga" was the model for Hikaru Genji.



At least "Nobunaga," "Hideyoshi," and "Ieyasu" are full of them, so that is not a problem.


But the Heian period, huh? And if they are talking about this area, it must be a story about power struggles. And it's a very insidious one at that.


As for the Heian period, I have a considerable prejudice and dislike for it.


Excerpted from "The Day a Researcher Who Hates Twitter Decided to

(エピソードその1)「逢ひみての 後の心にくらぶれば 昔はものを 思はざりけり ~権中納言敦忠~(あなたとお会いした後に比べると、昔は、なーんにも考えていなかったんだなーと思います--江端意訳」。

(Episode #1) "If I compare it to after meeting you, in the past, I didn't think about things - Gon Chunagon Atsutada - (Compared to after meeting you, in the past I didn't think about anything - Ebata's interpretation).


This is a famous waka poem from the Hyakunin Isshu, a Japanese anthology of 100 poems. When I first heard this waka poem, I thought, "Do you think you are fooling the people? When I thought of such a terrible person serving as a minister of our country, I felt the anger that the people who must have been suffering from poverty and heavy taxation must have felt.



Incidentally, Gon Chunagon Atsutada (Minamoto Atsutada) was born in 964 and died in 1039.


And Fujiwara no Michinaga was born in 966 and died in 1028.


As I said, there is an overlap between the background periods.


This is a taiga drama from an era when people who sang songs like this were in power.


(I mean, the primary method of politics in those days was to "sing songs and pray to God," which was the primary method of statecraft (which makes me angry)).


I do not know whether I can accept or reject this great drama.


I don't have to watch it if I don't like it.


Aside from that.



The wife also expressed another concern.


The problem is the poor production of "Chushingura."


In the old days, during the year-end and New Year's holidays, some terrestrial TV channels used to show "Chushingura," but for the past ten years or so, "Chushingura" has been a poor production.

―― このままでは、日本人から"忠臣蔵"が忘れ去られてしまう

"If nothing is done, the Japanese people will forget " Chushingura "."


And my wife is concerned.


This time, I did not comment on anything.


Since I once had a 'slip of the tongue' on this subject.

2023-12-24 酔った勢いで、あなたの上司に『お前が"それ"言う?』とか言わないようにして下さいね。 [長年日記]

「情報統制を行い、自由な言論を弾圧し、平和を唱えながら、他国を侵略する国家元首」 ―― っていうのは、あまり珍しくないのです。

It is not unusual for a head of state to "control information, suppress free speech, and invade other countries while advocating peace.


However, I feel that a former head of state who has a 'stop non-Nazi (Nazism)' policy is a "novelty."


I've been doing some research on what exactly Russian President Vladimir Putin's advocacy of "de-Nazification" is referring to in Ukraine, and I'm not sure I understand it.


I know that this was motivated by the Russian cause of 'protecting the Russian population concerning the conflict in the Donetsk and Luhansk regions of eastern Ukraine and defending them from attacks by the Ukrainian government.' Still, I am not sure why this is 'Nazism.'


What I know about the characteristics of Nazism is,


(1) Racism and Superiority


(2) Dictatorship and tyranny


(3) Territorial expansion and invasion


(4) Anti-Semitism


(5) National Socialism


(6) Forced Labor and Concentration Camps


around here, however, this looks like something "Russia" is doing, not "Ukraine."


If the head of state himself, who is holding up "Non-Nazi (Nazism)," is practicing Nazism, this is not only "novel" but also "progressive," I think.




It is the season for year-end parties.


When alcohol is involved, people sometimes say things they do not usually speak.


- You must enjoy your work (even if your boss forces you to do work you don't need to).


- 'It's only a job if you can finish it on time' (even if your boss pushes you to do your boss's work).


- 'You don't have enough imagination' (even if your boss has never come up with an invention story on his own, even if he criticizes your proposal in one way or another).


Don't get drunk and say to your boss, "You say it?"

2023-12-25 ―― AIによる世界支配の方が、まだマシじゃね? [長年日記]


Yesterday, I was working while playing the anime "Youjo Senki."


Episode 8, "Trial by Fire," depicts a campaign of extermination (massacre) against an entire city, using as its legal basis the construction of a legal logic that allows ground warfare in the city, including non-combatant civilians, to eliminate the resistance (militia) that has hidden in the city.

(Don't be cheated by the name "Youjo Senki." That is highly sophisticated political fiction, written about war strategy and tactics, politics, economics, law, and technology.)


Incidentally, I had noticed that the story was based on the "bombing of Dresden" by the U.S. and British Allied forces.


The "Bombing of Dresden" refers to the massive air raid on the German city of Dresden (commonly known as the "Pearl of the Elbe").


The raid devastated the city of Dresden, killing many of its citizens and making the event a controversial war crime.

ちなみにこの話(「火の試練」)は、イスラエル軍の、ガザ地区侵攻の話ではありません ―― が、同じ話です。

Incidentally, this story ("Trial by Fire") is not about the Israeli army's invasion of the Gaza Strip -- but it is the same story.



'Is there such a legal loophole (combat that allows civilians to be killed as collateral damage)?' I asked ChatGPT.




And thus, I was scolded by ChatGPT.


As a follow-up, ChatGPT gave me a lot of information when I asked for specific examples of laws prohibiting the killing of non-combatants (civilians) as collateral damage in urban warfare.


This will be developed at a later date.



Still, to think that at least that and that country are engaged in an ongoing battle/war that (1) is prohibited by numerous international laws and (2) would be scolded by the generating AI (ChatGPT),

―― AIによる世界支配の方が、まだマシじゃね?

"Wouldn't world domination by AI still be better?"


I think it is a good idea.

2023-12-26 『人類を舐めんなよ』と、諭されているような気がして、少し楽しい気分になりました。 [長年日記]


I am now a college student while working. I am back to being a struggling student again.


Well, this time, it is not "financial" but "physical" and "ability" struggling students.


Research activities are hard, but so are lectures.


Classes in which the official language is "English" are naturally hard, but the content of the lectures is even harder.



Nevertheless, the lectures are interesting.


Here are the teaching materials for the first half of this school year.


I have written a column before on game theory, and the idea of Dr. Garrett Hardin's "Tragedy of the Commons" appears in conjunction with that game theory.


When learning about the "Tragedy of the Commons," many people easily despair (as I did) that 'humanity can't share resources.'



However, Dr. Elinor Ostrom, the 2009 Nobel Prize winner in economics, boldly challenged the "tragedy of the commons.


After critiquing the fundamentals of policy analysis as applied to natural resources, she provided unique empirical data to explore the conditions under which common-pool resource problems have been resolved satisfactorily. She used many examples to show the factors that prevent "tragedies of the commons."


I was honestly moved by the words, "This is what 'scales from the eyes' means.



The Prisoner's Dilemma or Tragedy of the Commons are easy examples.


However, the book is full of the wisdom of humanity that has overcome these obstacles (although, by the way, it is also full of examples that could not be overcome).


"Don't fuck with humanity."


She seemed to make me feel like that and fun.

2023-12-27 「やはり俺の青春ラブコメはまちがっている」の主人公は、一貫して、数学嫌いのキャラクターとして描かれています。 [長年日記]


The main character in "My Youth Romantic Comedy is Wrong as I Expected" is consistently portrayed as a character who hates math.


However, I feel uncomfortable with this characterization.


This protagonist can make precise relationships and even accurate predictions about the subsequent ramifications of the events he generates.


He uses a multivariate optimal solution method for human relationships, and for time variation, he uses an exponential function to imagine the human forgetting function, etc.


In other words, he hates math, even though he uses it all over his daily life.


This is a detrimental effect of the false assumption that the purpose of mathematics is to find the only solution.

I regret the design of these characters because I believe that the essence of mathematics is "Falmi Estimation."


I mean, in most animations, the character of the guy who "likes math" is a jerk or an enemy.


It is as if people who "love math" are portrayed as 'inferior/distorted in personality.'


I feel the world's ill will toward mathematics.



Earlier, I wrote the folloiwng in my journal,

"Against the child's "What on earth do I study for?" Adults must respond to this question."



One of the solutions to this, I think one of the answers to this question is that


"Studying mathematics can reduce the fear of new AI technologies."



I have been saying for a long time that the mathematics used in AI technology can be understood within the scope of high school mathematics.


I have not changed my opinion on this, even with the advent of generative AI.


In truth, there would be nothing to say if you could 'build your own simple AI core engine,' but that might be a bit too much.


However, it is more reassuring to think that you are governed by something you can understand (to a point) than to believe that you are governed by something you don't understand.



Perhaps you are caught up in the word 'domination'?


But humans are already controlled by machines, you know. You could even say that it's 'done'.


Already, we are dancing in the palms of our computers, from traffic lights to traffic jam information, vaccinations, to bullet train ticketing systems.


The only difference is that we humans are the ones who make and run the computers.


Studying mathematics reduces the phobia (fear) of these systems.


I wonder if the same could be said about AI technology, in my opinion.

2023-12-28 ゴルゴ13の「かっこいい」イスラエル軍や諜報機関は、私の中で幻想になりました。 [長年日記]


I have written comments on various world conflicts in a glib manner, but I am not a student of world conflicts.


To be clear, anyone who has read "Golgo 13" can speak to the extent of my comments.


Of course, "Golgo 13" does not write everything right.


There is a great deal of misunderstanding about telecommunications and AI technologies, and many recent IT trends are "nonsense" in their content.


For example, I sometimes feel like saying, "Nowadays, people don't make international calls (using the call function of social networking services is normal)," but I guess that would be a bit of a senseless



Numerous Israeli military and intelligence agencies appear in "Golgo 13" (and many in Kaoru Shintani's manga (e.g., Area 88)).


The Israeli military and intelligence agencies in Golgo 13 are "cool," to say the least.

With meticulous operational planning, daring execution, and intelligent on-the-spot judgment, they destroy and kill their targets with pinpoint accuracy, then disappear without a trace.


For example, "Mossad" continues to be portrayed as the world's most excellent spy organization, which fascinated Golgo 13 fans like us.



Ebata: "This invasion of the Gaza Strip, there is not a shred of intelligence."


Wife: "To reopen the killing of unarmed civilians as 'unavoidable' is beyond unseemly."


However, it was Hamas that first launched this invasion. It is Israel's right to retaliate against Hamas.


But I think it is also a matter of degree.


I think 'if 1,000 civilians in your country are killed, 1,000 civilians on the enemy side will be collateral damage' is one possible pitfall, regardless of the pros and cons.

しかし、20倍もの非戦闘員を殺害し、今なお殺害を継続している ―― 『本当に、どうかしているんじゃないか』と思う。

But they have killed 20 times as many noncombatants and continue to do so -- 'Really, I think they're out of their minds.



The "cool" Israeli military and intelligence agencies of Golgo 13 became an illusion in my mind.


Or perhaps they were 'fictions that existed only in Golgo 13 from the beginning.

2023-12-29 田中角栄という人物は、私とその上の世代の人間に、「金」「権力」「信念(執念)」「正義」「悪」「権勢」「没落」「病気(死)」というものを、創作物ではなく、リアルな現実として示し続けた人物です。 [長年日記]

I watched "Kakuei Tanaka: The Dream and Fall of Reforming the Archipelago," The Butterfly Effect in the Century of Images.


I was sincerely surprised.


Kakuei Tanaka was a man who continued to show me and the people of the generation above me that "money," "power," "belief (persistence)," "justice," "evil," "downfall," and "illness (death)" are not fictions but realistic realities.


I cannot deny that a fraction of my values have been influenced by how this man Kakuei Tanaka is.


He was that great man (Try to ask anyone in my generation).



What surprised me was that the life of Kakuei Tanaka could be summarized in a 45-minute documentary program.


And the 45 minutes of content was well done, not too much, not too little, not too much to complain about.

―― この番組は"これ"でいい。でも、"これ"でいいのか?

"This program is fine, but is it good enough?"


I have been watching and commenting on NHK documentaries, and now I am breaking out in a nasty sweat.


"Ebata, You think you know what you're talking about just because you've seen an NHK documentary."


I feel as if those around me are blaming me.


At the end of this year, the issue of back taxes by politicians has become a significant issue.


"Political these days are very easily interviewed," and "secretaries' mouths have become much lighter."

昭和の政治家たちの、あの権力への固執、絶対に白状しない根性、必要なら秘書や証人喚問直前の人物を自殺に追い込む(本当の話。興味のある人は調べてみて下さい)までの暴力 ――

That adherence to power of Showa-era politicians, the guts to never come clean, to drive secretaries and people just before testimony to suicide if necessary (true story. If you're interested, look it up)


Such things were the norm; thus, the struggle between prosecutors and politicians was a theatrical spectacle involving the public.


Although such frequent struggles and upheavals always forced Japan's foreign and domestic policies to stagnate many times, the Japanese economy nevertheless continued to grow.


Japan's national power at that time was so strong that people believed that "tomorrow will surely be better than today.



Values and rules change over time, and we must adapt.


Hence, the current politicians should behave according to the current rules, and rightly so.


If someone like Kakuei Tanaka were to appear today, I am sure he would only be met with dismay.


Come to think of it, celebrities seem to be making a lot of noise, too.

この時代の政治家と芸能人は、この窮地をどう凌いでいくか ―― "昭和"とは違う、"令和"の闘いを観覧させて頂きたいと思います。

I would like to see how politicians and entertainers of this era will overcome this predicament -- I would like to watch the struggle of the "Reiwa" era, which is different from the "Showa" era.

2023-12-30 ドラマ「きのう何食べた?」は、ドラマ嫌いの私が、珍しく視聴を続けてきたドラマです。 [長年日記]


The drama "What'd You Eat Yesterday?" is something that I, as a drama hater, have unusually continued to watch.


Not only because the story is concise and exciting but also because Seiyo Uchino's acting is so good that you'll forget it is acting.


Speaking of Seiyo Uchino in my mind,


"Kansuke Yamamoto" in NHK's historical drama "Fu-Rin-Kazan

■日曜劇場「JIN -仁-」の「坂本龍馬」

"Ryoma Sakamoto" in the Sunday drama "JIN



These characters are representative of the "disgusting, dirty, douchey man who lives by his beliefs.


So I still remember the initial shock of "What did you eat yesterday? I still remember the shock of the first time I watched it.

番組製作者は、一体何考えているんだ? と思ったものですが、

What were the program producers thinking? I thought,

―― キャスティングミスではなかったんだ

"This was not a casting error."


It was a reminder of the greatness of professionals who plan dramas.



While watching the drama "What Did You Eat Yesterday? I keep telling myself that.


"Don't think I know anything about same-sex couples just by watching this drama.

I must continue to study about same-sex couples and same-sex marriage.


Still, there is one thing that inevitably bothers me.



'Aren't the meals prepared in the dramas not enough for an adult male?'


With that amount of food, I worry that they won't be able to maintain my physique and will get sick if I'm not careful.


Less than what my wife eats, not to mention me.


I am concerned, although the drama includes the setting of 'they are overly nervous about obesity.'



I, at one time, almost became anorexic.


Everyone, regardless of gender, should be aware of this.

2023-12-31 今の私が、世界で一番憎悪しているフレーズは、『死ぬ気になれば、何でもできる』です。 [長年日記]


If I had to pick the biggest incident of the year, I would say that I became depressed.


I have written a lot about this in my diary, so I will not explain.


Anyway, the phrase I now hate the most is,

―― 死ぬ気になれば、何でもできる

"If you are willing to die, you can do anything."



And I am deeply offended by the fact that there are so many low-life people in this world who spout phrases like this without a second thought, who do not understand even a millimeter of the true nature of this disease.


I want to yell at them with the biggest and loudest voice I can muster (including my own in the past), "There are situations in this world where it feels 'absolutely cheaper to choose the process of dying than to continue living,' and the diseases those situations create."


OK. Please remember that I, a "calculation geek," drew this conclusion based on my results and rigorous calculations.


I am also shocked at how easy it is in today's society to "create such a situation" or "get involved in such a situation."


I want to make all the people in the world understand, by force (even if I have to beat them), this desperate fear of "not being able to move my body," even though I have something to do in front of me and I know how to do it all.



This year, I understood at the soul level that suicide caused by depression occurs entirely independently of the person's intentions, abilities, qualities, experiences, and everything else.


This was a tremendously powerful experience and probably the most potent weapon I will ever have.



Also, this "depression" is no good, no matter how much "understanding" there is around you. All of you are helpless. No one's words can reach my ears when I am in this state.


What saved me this time was my wife's "compulsion"...or rather, "ability to do it," as she repeatedly told me, "Tell your boss at work what's going on. She repeatedly told me, "I don't care what the outcome of the situation is.


Words like 'it seems hard' and 'it seems tough' did not affect me (at least on me).


The only way to "help" is to "physically help."


Being 'in touch with their feelings' does not mean 'helping.'



One example.


Even If you say to someone about to fall off a cliff, "Hang in there," that person will eventually fall off the cliff.


Only when you get to the point of "bringing the rope and pulling them up" can you say that you have "saved" him.