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2021-11-19 At least I don't have the slightest qualms about following, discerning, accepting, obeying, acquiescing, and getting down on my knees to "the wad of cash" [長年日記]

I've often said that "anger control" is difficult for me.

It is often said, "When anger arises, wait six seconds," but my anger does not have that kind of lifetime.

In my case, my anger stays light for six or sixty days, and sometimes for six years or more.

I have very little anger that can boil over in an instant.

In my case, I have a nasty anger that is persistent, lingering and long, and using my own logic, I can set off a chain reaction of anger that reaches critical mass.

Well, to put it bluntly, I'm aware that 'I'm pretty much the worst.

However, this does not mean that my "self-esteem" will be shaken.

Rather, it increases the sense of denial of others.

It means,

"It is not my fault but the world's fault"

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I'm the kind of person who gets easily "offended" by the text of an email.

That's why I even put out this warning.

However, the only people who would benefit from such a warning are disinterested parties.

In my work, this kind of thing happens every day, and I can't do my job if I'm upset about it.

This is because work is made up of a network of inexhaustible and tedious links.

That advantage can easily be turned upside down by the nature of the work.

Specifically, it depends on who has the "money" to make the move.

No matter how unpleasant a person may be, he or she may one day become a "gold master" for you. As you get older, you realize that this is a normal, everyday thing.

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So, my "anger management" is to look at the face of the person I am angry with as a wad of cash.

The thing we are dealing with is not a "human being".

The wad of cash is talking.

At least I don't have the slightest qualms about following, discerning, accepting, obeying, acquiescing, and getting down on my knees to "the wad of cash"