(Continuation from yesterday)

Recently, I realized that there is a certain explanation for this contradictory behavior in my childhood.

When I was a child, my characters were essentially "negative" -- or rather, "dark".

I had a habit of not seeing things as they appear on the surface, but trying to find the "other side" of them, and interpreting them in a "malicious" way.

(This is obvious if you read my columns and blogs, now)

The children's "winners" were what we now call "extrovert" or "lively", had many friends, didn't question things, and listened to adults.

(I know now that they were "childish.")

The opposing "losers" were what we now call "introvert" or "gloomy" as they were called then.

Even back then, I was afraid of being labeled as "gloomy" by those around me.

Naturally, being "gloomy" also meant being ostracized (what we now call "bullied").

For children who are controlled within the unit of a class, being left out means death in school life.

Basically, in the extraterritoriality (lawlessness) of "school," where the concept of law (criminal punishment) does not apply, children who are labeled as "dark-skinned" have no way to protect themselves.

Regardless of what I looked like on the outside, I was in fact a "loser","introvert" or "gloomy" and schools were "hell itself" for me.

-----

In such an environment, what I happened to carry with me was a "weapon" called "piano".

Playing the piano made me popular, mostly with girls.

It was already the ultimate weapon, no questions asked.

If you've ever taken piano lessons, you know that if you play the piano every day for two to three years, you can easily learn to play by ear by yourself.

In addition, you will be able to play anime theme songs, popular songs, etc. on the piano using both hands -- not the main melody, but the performance.

With this, there is no way you won't be popular.

The piano I was playing was always surrounded by several girls.

------

"Ebata... I've always thought you were the worst unpleasant person, however you are still bragging it again"

You might be thinking.

I think so too.

But, you know, I've never told this story to anyone else.

I have never done this to my wife or my daughter.

Do you think it's possible that I'm not telling you about this delicious boast?

No, no. It's not possible.

There is one thing that comes to mind for me right now.

Even I couldn't believe it, but maybe I was "desperate".

The "loser", "introvert" or "gloomy" had to survive in the "hell" of school.

Though I am pointing out the inadequacies of the school system, criticizing teachers for their lack of knowledge, and worrying about children's narrow view, I was just afraid of bullies and thinking of ways to escape from them, and was

"An ordinary child"

That's why I couldn't let go of my weapon of choice, the piano, which I hated to death -- until I was in the eighth grade.

I see. There is no way I can talk about such a shameful thing. It's no wonder I've unconsciously sealed it away.

(To be continued)